Valentine’s Day has come and gone. Nothing remarkable happened to me or by me to commemorate this day of profound or marketed love. I made the most minimal effort to participate in the holiday. I sent out cursory texts to a few women on my “possible” list and to a few of my good friends. It was mostly a routine day. I didn’t do anything special. I don’t recall what I did last year for Valentine’s Day, but since I was single, I’m sure my night was similar, and included, the customary movie watching, eating on the couch, and late-night drinking.
But I am a person that fully participates in Valentine’s Day, when, I have a significant person in my life. I believe in it…the spirit of it. It’s the day designated for the overt expression of love between two people…or more (not leaving you out polygamist), or less…self-love. These past years, this has been my tragic failing of the day. I neglected to express love for the person I wake up with every morning, the person who’s company I most enjoy, my “greatest love of all”, cue Whitney Houston song, ME! And ultimately, I do love myself. How, could I not? I’m adorable!
V-day reminds me of all the lengths I have gone to win the affection of women. I’ve bought expensive gifts, from shoes to vacations, I’ve written awful poetry, painted entire rooms, given many a lengthy back massage (that’s my closer) all in the attempt to share time with women, who I’ve genuinely cared for, or marginally liked. So now, on this supreme day of love, I couldn’t even bother to get a foot massage or even dress-up in silky pajamas for the most special person in my life, me. I did wipe off the table before I ate though, but I don’t think that was an expression of love, as much as it was just good hygiene. I did nothing for this beautiful smart person that I am. But if I were a dating a woman during this time, I would’ve attempted to make her night as special as possible. Aren’t I deserving? “Ain’t I a woman too?” asked Sojourner Truth, so many years ago, as she sought to affirm her worth?
“Well, Yes, I am.”
And, I will treat me, like the special woman, I am. So as a mission of love, henceforth, I will exclusively date myself, Person Pat, for 2 weeks. And I, as Suitor Pat, will step up and go out of my way to treat, Person Pat, as I would, any incredible woman in the process of dating.
What does that mean actually?
When I go out, I will dress like I would if I was going out on a date.
I will pamper myself, in small ways throughout the week.
I will compliment myself for small successes.
I will follow through with all my commitments with myself.
I will spend time and support my own interests and activities like I would the interests and activities of someone I’m dating.
And I will abstain from sex for two weeks. Now this is new. I’m thoroughly a person that will sleep with a woman on the first date, but if history is any indicator, it hasn’t really worked out in the long run. It tends to complicate matters early on. So, I’m leaving the sex out, for now, and will just work on, getting to know this Person-Pat. I’ve got a good feeling about this woman. She may be the one.
Check back for my updates on “Dating Pat”!
Stand up comedy, black female comedians, blogs for women, funny blogs, love and relationships, dating, living single